I dah lama nak cakap kat you, tapi I malu. Ye la kan, kat umah kita atas atap tu kan ramai sangat orang. I segan sebab aritu I dah nampak you tengah borak dengan Zek. Pastu Fifi cakap kat I lepas makan mangga haritu, you dah break ngan Zek. I pun apa lagi, terus cuba luck I la kan. Tak sangka pulak you turun bawah harini. I macam dah agak you suka tengok baldi merah tu jugak.
I harap you terima cinta I Bi. I tau I tak hensem mana. Lidah I pun average je. Tapi ia terjelir untuk you Bi. Lupakan Zek tu. I tau dia selalu berlagak cakar-cakar tunjuk kuku dia tajam kat atas atap. I takde pretensi macho tu semua Bi. I sensitif, caring, suka contemplate existence I tepi longkang petang-petang macam ni. I tak salah pilih hari. Sebab harini hari I. I toleh belakang, tengok you tengah tengok I, ekor you berhayun kiri-kanan macam dilanda bayu kosmik yang turut membuai perasaan I. Lantas, tanpa kata-kata, you peluk I. Dan I izinkan. Bahkan menuntut hak I untuk dicintai oleh you, sayang.
Well, to the local Works Department actually. We’ve been hosts to a colony of biawaks, maybe 10-15 of them, turning our bedroom ceiling into their clawy, scratchy lovenest. We’d be lying-in on lazy weekend mornings and they’d crawl around, clawing on the wooden ceiling making strange sounds with their tails and A would scream in her groggy morning voice “Woi!”.
I’d be quiet because I’m more mesra alam and I think it’s kinda hot but don’t tell her that.
So A called the fire station a few weeks ago. This abang bomba came in one of them red bomba vans, took off his boots, put on A’s pink vassini-mydin sandals, climbed onto the ceiling and caught one of them pesky biawaks. He then proceeded to put the poor creature into a sack my mom gave him. The he went back to the station. Leaving his boots. And the biawak in the guni. And wearing A’s pink vassini-mydin sandals. That didn’t work really well did it?
So in her latest battle plan in this anti-biawak crusade, she wrote a letter to the Public Works Department (included below). So people with similar biawak-related matters will have a template. Let’s just hope they don’t steal your sandals too.
A dimunitive but significant section of the Malaysian Blogosphere bemoans the departure of starfish who has left for greener pastures.