On Blue Paper

You wouldn’t fucking believe it, the way my life turned out to be. It’s not even funny anymore. I used to think that there’s some sort of silver lining somewhere. That it’s going to be worth all this. But it’s not. It seethes and reeks you up and rots you until escape is the only thing necessary.

Yeah there were moments when I believed. Juita’s eyes on fucking skyscrapers on a rainy Sunday afternoon. Looking at the sea from her balcony. Her sweet heavy hand on my belly. But who gets caught up with these things anyway now. Its pain baby, that’s what everybody talks about these days.

Yeah suicide this, depression that. Palahniuk, Bukowski, Self. Fucking Ishiguro and fucking clones. Who gives two shits? I for one, don’t.

And life was meant to be beautiful, you know. For everyone. You’re supposed to be sad when you leave it. It breaks your heart to see all, everything you’ve ever known or love fade out like bad youporn porn.

And these things are supposed to be short. It’s supposed to develop some kind of reaction from life. You know, the thing you’re living behind. So sign off I will.



Filed under fiction

5 responses to “On Blue Paper

  1. Thee Dr.

    Sorrow seeps into your heart
    Through a pinhole
    Just like a faucet that leaks
    And there is comfort in the sound
    But while you debate half-empty and half-full
    It’s slowly rising
    Your love is gonna drown

  2. Whoah Mat, that’s some heavy Sylvia Plath shit. You wrote that? More please…

  3. Thee Dr.

    I didn’t write it–I just borrowed it from the chorus of ‘Marching Bands of Manhattan’ by Death Cab For Cutie off of ‘Plans’…and yes,they sure do have good lyrics–you should check their shit out I think you’ll really like it.

  4. Yeah I’ve heard of this band but never really had the opportunity to check them out. You’ve sparked my interest though.

  5. Thee Dr.

    They’re originally from Seattle–there’s a VH1 Classic show called ‘Vh1 Classic presents’ where they take an older artist and team them up with some newer artists and they play at the Taj Mahal in Vegas (which is huge )and cover each other’s songs–one episode had Elvis Costello with Death Cab,Fiona Apple and Billy Joe Armstrong–you gotta look for it–you know I don’t usually get into this genre (indie,post-punk,etc.) but this shit was INSANE!!!!

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